loudon | ic spam

Actually that's the other reason I'm DMing. I could use your eyes on it.

Why? I'm stupid and no fun.

You're literally a plant, and lived experience is more valuable than grad school books from 15 years ago.

And I'm not exactly a fun machine.

Edited 2023-07-19 14:01 (UTC)

[...] All right, what do you need?

Aside from general plant expertise, I need you to stop me from smashing this stupid fruit. I know we need to be neutral in the lab but Sweetapple, I hate this thing.

Maybe we can have a melon smashing party when you're done with it.

Which step in the scientific process is that, again?

I dunno, I'm an art guy.

[...] I mean it about Zee, though. She really didn't intend to upset you, and now she's overthinking about how to say something to make up for it that won't upset you more.

She doesn't have to make up for anything. I know how people see me, and it's not untrue.

I think she was really just talking about balloons being fun.

Yeah, and then Lenz chimed in about my lack of a backbone. I don't know why I'm here.

I'm not defending Lenz. I just didn't say anything to him because you don't need people to fight your battles for you.

Every time I talk to anyone, I just start shit, somehow. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me.

Some people like a teasing back and forth, and they assume other people do too. You don't. Not everybody knows that, though.

It's different if you're actually friends with me, but most of these people don't have that kind of rapport.

This feels like those people who are "playfully" rude to people on the internet who they don't actually know.

How do you make that kind of rapport with someone? Not a general you, specifically You.

[...] I don't know.

~~I told Rory I would~~ I'm the problem.

Or, you've been hurt and now you're extra cautious.

[...] I mean, yeah? But am I wrong?

Some of the time, probably.

I honestly don't really know why I'm here.

IRIS is subtly brainwashing us into staying and it's in your nature to resist, so you're feeling out of place.

[...] Can't say I particularly love the idea of probably-dying for an indifferent government and a bunch of people who largely neither need nor want me here.

But I told Rory I'd give it 'til my birthday at least.

See, here's the thing, Sweetapple. Plenty of us want you here, you just aren't wired to let yourself believe it.

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